Be sure to read the first portion of this lengthy post about behavior and classroom management, in which was discussed the four crucial beliefs necessary for taking charge of your classroom; dangerous students; and, strategies for the first week of school. Here, in this blog, we pick up with discussing students who didn’t get the message, during the first week, that you’re in charge and continue to be disruptive in one way or another, including a variety of strategies you might like to try.
Let me begin by saying (and also reiterating, if you’ve already read the first portion of this two-part blog on behavior) that my heart is full of love and support for our profession and our education systems, for all teachers, and especially for all students—yours, mine, our personal children and grandchildren, all those who move on from us, those who struggle with behavior and learning, and all the others who wait in the wings while we try our best to manage the ones who are interfering with the teaching and learning that should (and can) be happening.
I hear about so many teachers struggling with classroom management and, specifically, behavior management. On a kindergarten Facebook group I follow, (too many) teachers were posting that they were terrified to go back to work on Monday morning because the situation was so bad. Students were harming each other, destroying the classroom, and making it impossible to teach. Parents were upset and complaining. Several teachers indicated no support from their administrators. These teachers felt hopeless—they were crying, ready to quit, wondering what they would do next and how to make a living. It breaks my heart knowing that teachers aren’t able to enjoy their job, let alone provide the quality teaching students deserve. In this business, you will love going to work every day if you feel that you are in control of your classroom and the teaching and learning that is happening there. After all, teaching is what we all want to do; that is why we went into this profession.
I will say upfront that the strategies I am going to share with you are not the run-of-the-mill “safe” strategies that you find with a basic internet search. A lot of what I say here may not be popular with everyone, but most of you will find my honesty and techniques realistic and refreshing, especially if you are at your wit’s end doing what’s politically correct and safe to talk about. My suggestions get to the heart of the matter—explicitly stating the expectations, explicitly and systematically teaching children how (and why) to meet our expectations, and then holding them accountable for doing so.
What To Do about Those Students Who Continue to Disregard the Expectations
No matter how successful you are that first week at conveying the message that you are in charge of your classroom, there will always be a handful of students who continue to test the limits of your authority. I find it helpful to remember that all youngsters—humans and animals alike—are born to test the limits. Testing the limits is natural and emotionally healthy and realizing this makes it easier to accept that it’s just another thing you need to address and teach in your classroom. Now we will move into philosophy and strategies that are helpful after those first two weeks of school.
Make a Deliberate Shift from Barking Orders to Explaining Your Thinking
As you move from the first chaotic couple of weeks of school into the “rest of the year,” you’ll want to make a deliberate shift from sounding authoritative (“I said NO”) to sounding genuinely loving and thus instructive (“I care about you and this is why I want you to do it this way”).
Most of what you do for excellent classroom and behavior management will be proactive and positive and barely perceptible to the students or onlookers. Things such as how you arrange your classroom, all the positive comments you make to students that let them know you believe in them, the care you show that reiterates you love your students, your well-thought-out lessons, the organization of your supplies, and your smile and acceptance constantly communicate to students that you are showing up for them every day and not giving up on them. It is important to explicitly state these things as well. Say: “Why does this classroom look so good? Why do I come here every day? I choose the best books for you. I want you to work your hardest. I keep telling you to pay attention to me when I teach you. Why? I’ll tell you why. Listen. It’s because I love you and I want you to be really good at school and have a happy life.” When students know that their improved behavior and success is of utmost importance to you because you love and care about them, they will try harder to meet your expectations.
Be Aware of Discipline Styles and What You’re Using and Why
It’s helpful to know about basic discipline styles and to think about which ones you should employ when. They can all be effective depending on the situation and the child; in fact, using a combination of all of them will create a strong foundation of behavior teaching and management.
Positive discipline is proactive and it’s all about teaching, encouragement, and praise. When I teach my students about Whole Body Listening, I am initially using positive discipline. When the song ends and everyone is silent and still, I say, “Oh good, now I can read this very special book I chose just for you.” When positive discipline is being used, there are no hard feelings or consequences necessary.
Gentle discipline focuses on preventing problems. We all use techniques such as redirecting, distracting, and humor and these are indeed very effective. After singing the Whole Body Listening song, if I saw a student looking at the student seated next to them on the floor and trying to get their attention, I might say, “Oh no! Your eyeballs think they’re supposed to watch your neighbor. You tell your eyeballs, ‘Look at the teacher, eyeballs!’” Gentle discipline often quickly diffuses a situation and allows you to get back to the business of teaching.
Boundary-based discipline is about establishing rules and setting limits. Children can be given choices, but there will be consequences for misbehavior. It may sound controlling and authoritative, but when you have 20 or more young children trying to function in a small space for seven hours a day, the truth of the matter is that rules and expectations are a must. If we sing the Whole Body Listening song and someone is playing with the sequins on their shirt and trying to show them to their neighbor, I say, “We will sing the song one more time and if your body isn’t quiet, then you’ll need to get away from us and sit at a table.” The student has a choice; meet the expectation or leave the group. And, notice that the consequence is logical and makes sense.
Feelings-based discipline helps children learn about their emotions. When students understand and can verbalize their feelings, they may not act out so often. After singing the song, I might see a student with a grouchy face. “What’s wrong? Your face looks grouchy.” The student says, “He’s wiggling and he’s not supposed to.” “It’s hard to learn when we’re frustrated. Remember, you can move away from anyone who’s bothering you.”
Behavior modification involves positive and negative consequences. Misbehavior is often ignored or a consequence can be given; good behavior is recognized with praise or rewards. Using the same example, if I sing the Whole Body Listening song and all but two students are quiet and still and ready to learn, I might say, “Great! Almost everyone is listening and ready to learn. That means we can put a marble in our jar. Remember, when the jar is full, we’ll have a party.” Or, on an individual basis, “The first time we sang the song, your body was not quiet. This time you tried harder. You’re ready to learn, but first, let’s give you a ROAR ticket for the box.”
Let’s talk rewards. Many teachers believe that they have to have a rewards system in place. What will students get if they behave? Tickets, points, candy, trips to the treasure box, a note home to parents, and group-based prizes such as extra recess or parties are common rewards. To me, establishing a system based on rewards and prizes is not a good idea. First, doing so develops extrinsic motivation rather than intrinsic motivation. Students learn to behave not because it feels good and comes with its own rewards, but because it might earn them a tangible reward. Rewards convey the message that you do not expect young children to behave unless there’s something in it for them. Rewards put the students in control, not the teacher. Second, this is not how the world works. I don’t get a Skittle for participating at staff meetings. I don’t get a bonus in my paycheck for arriving at work on time. My husband doesn’t put a marble in my jar every time I do a household chore. In the real world, behavior stays in check because of consequences. If you don’t speak up at a staff meeting, your idea won’t be heard and the changes you’re hoping for won’t be addressed. If you don’t go to work, you don’t get a paycheck. If you harm someone, you may wind up in jail. Third, implementing reward systems is time consuming, not to mention costly. We are a PBIS school and we’re supposed to periodically give out ROAR tickets for positive behavior. Initially—years ago, when we started this—I diligently wrote the student’s name, the date, and the rule they followed each time I gave a ticket. Within five minutes, I knew it wasn’t sustainable. I was surrounded by thousands of positive behaviors and I just couldn’t keep up. What ultimately happened—and what always happens with a system like this—is that the students who often misbehaved tended to get the recognition and the rewards each time they demonstrated desired behaviors. And the other students were ignored. Why? Because there just isn’t time to recognize the positive behaviors of 20-some students. Police officers don’t pull over and reward the thousands of drivers who are going the posted speed limit. Rather, they focus on those who are not obeying the law and hand out the agreed-upon consequence, all the while ignoring the rest of us who are behaving.
Behavior modification—with its inherent rewards and consequences—does work well with those Tier 3, red-zone behaviors. Reserve this approach for the one-on-one work you need to do with your most extreme students. (Don’t be afraid to reach out to your administrator, counselor, MTSS team, or district behavior team for support and ideas.) Everyone else deserves the right to learn how to function within and experience the world as it’s going to be once they leave school—a world that requires intrinsic motivation because it doesn’t recognize or reward all the good behaviors one does.
The Ultimate Reward
Actually, there is one reward that I constantly offer my students. That reward is the opportunity to participate in our learning activities and experience the empowerment of knowledge and self-control. Kindergartners grow and change rapidly and they can feel it just as surely as we observe it. They are aware that yesterday they couldn’t write their name or that they can now almost tie their shoes by themselves or that knowing the letter sounds means they can start reading words on their own, just like big kids do. This, coupled with the fact that almost everything we do in kindergarten is fun and challenging and social, means that they do not want to miss out. The consequence of not getting to participate is about all you need to start managing and changing behaviors. A child isn’t sitting respectfully in the group? Give them the choice of changing their behavior or going away and sitting at a table. (By the way, the table is not far away and they can continue to learn while there.) If your teaching is fun and interactive and empowering, students will want to come back. A student is “cutting the air” with her scissors right after you explained that we do not “cut the air”? Take the scissors away and say, “You can try again in a few moments. You can only use these scissors if you don’t ‘cut the air.’” Of course, she will want to use the scissors and do the activity. “I’ll only bring you to my reading table if I see you working hard on your own first.” Kids love to come to my table for reading instruction, so they’ll generally do what I ask because they don’t want to miss the chance. Constantly reiterate that students need to be respectful and meet your expectations to be invited to learn; you can even say, “I’m not inviting you until you stop doing that.” The possibility of missing out keeps the majority of students on task and respectful during teaching and learning time.
Natural Consequences
We’ve touched upon this and I’m sure you’re aware of the concept. But let me state it explicitly. Natural consequences happen naturally and require little thought or action from the teacher. If a student doesn’t listen and watch, their project won’t turn out the way it’s supposed to. If they don’t get their jacket, they might be cold. If they didn’t take me seriously when I was teaching about bothering other students and continued to bother other students, then they’ll need to stay in at recess and learn about it again. If they’re grabbing other students’ food in the lunchroom, they have to sit alone. If they don’t use the markers properly, they don’t get to use the markers. If they didn’t write during writing time and just played around or rested, then they’re given the opportunity to write during recess time while the other students play or rest. For the first few months, I frequently explain why I am giving consequences. “Class, why did I ask him to go to a table? Because I’m trying to help him learn how to be respectful. He will do much better in school if he’s respectful.” Natural consequences work well to change behavior because the child will realize that it was their actions or decisions that brought on the consequence.
Provide Work and Activities in the Zone of Proximal Development
The Zone of Proximal Development (ZPD) is the space between what a learner can do without assistance and what a learner can do with adult guidance or in collaboration with more capable peers. It is part of Russian psychologist Lev Vygotsky’s Theory of Learning and Development from the 1930s. What it tells us—and what you’ve probably observed with your students and also with your own learning—is that it’s vital to ask students to do learning and related work that is just right for them. If a teacher is constantly asking too little of her students, they will finish early and/or be bored and perhaps choose to act out for stimulation. If the work you’re giving a student is too hard and there are no supports in place, that student will most likely act out in frustration or just to draw attention away from the fact that they are not capable of doing the work. From my experience, the former tends to happen more than the latter in kindergarten. You’ll find many teachers who believe that kindergartners should be playing more than concentrating and working and it is often the case that kindergarten students aren’t adequately challenged. Don’t assume that if a student doesn’t initially finish their work or complains that something is too hard for them that you’re asking too much. It just might be that you need to teach them how to sit down and work for a set amount of time and help them experience the satisfaction of doing so.
1, 2, 3 Magic
I used this gentle discipline technique with my own daughters until they hit the teens and I am constantly using it in the kindergarten classroom. It is the one thing I recommend the most to other teachers and parents. The beauty of 1, 2, 3, Magic is that it practically alleviates the need to repeat your expectations over and over again as well as the trap of nagging children to do what you first asked them to do. Plus, it is simple to understand and use. After you’ve explicitly explained a rule or expectation or asked a child to do something, if the child starts to break the rule or does not comply with your request, you say, “One” or “That’s one.” Then you wait a few seconds. If the child does not do what they’re supposed to do, say, “Two…” Tone of voice is important here. You’ll want to indicate with just your tone (no other words should be used) that they better stop (or get going with what you asked of them) before you say three. The plan is that if you say three, there will be a consequence. You need to have the consequence in mind and be ready to use it if necessary, but you don’t need to tell the child what that consequence is. Not knowing what’s going to happen next is what gets most kids to comply. You’ll notice in a lot of my teaching videos that I just toss out “One” a lot, barely missing a beat in the teaching that I’m doing. I have found that I rarely have to say three, that I rarely apply a consequence, and that there are hardly ever any hard feelings with this technique.
Students have to be well aware of your expectations in your classroom setting for this to work so well. In my class, if a student has a toy out during instruction and I say, “Go put that away in your backpack, please” and they do not, I’ll say, “One…” Most likely, they’ll get up to follow through. Most won’t risk getting to two because it’s too close to three. The student doesn’t know what will happen if I say three and, frankly, sometimes I don’t either because the chances of it getting that far are so slim. If you do say three, immediately act on the situation with a consequence that’s a little more severe than your usual. That way, the whole class will know that you never want to get to three. (In this case, the student would have to give me the toy and I would keep it for a few days, which is worse than putting it away in their backpack.) I have also used this over the course of an activity or period in my class. For example, during our one-hour center time, if a student is bothering me or others, I’ll say, “One.” Maybe 20 minutes later they’re having trouble again. I’ll say, “That’s two. I already said one to you.” Fifteen minutes later, there’s more commotion. “Do I need to say three to you or are you going to stop?” They tend to stop.
If you want to read more about this method, either for use with your own children or with your class, there is a book with the same title. I often recommend 1, 2, 3 Magic to parents when they ask for help in getting their child to comply. It’s easy to learn and so effective. And it really does eliminate all the repeating, nagging, arguing, and power struggles that we can get ourselves into. Less is more; teach the rules and expectations and try to refrain from constantly repeating them to kids. 1, 2, 3 Magic makes this possible.
Keep Kids Busy
Your students are not going to mess around if you have set the expectation that they are to complete the work you’ve given them in a certain amount of time. How is this expectation possible when students are all over the place in their academic development and their ability to stay focused and complete tasks? The answer is to plan activities that have no end point; that is, the students learn that they are rarely “done” and are expected to keep working. Or, they always know what to do if they do finish. At my center during the first few weeks of school, the students practice writing their first name for the first five minutes of instruction at my table. Some students will write a couple of letters in their name; some will write their complete name just once; others will write their name several times during that short time. At the independent center, if students are writing the words from their current word list, all is well as long as they are using their best handwriting and writing words the entire time (15 minutes). They might get the entire list done; they might write just a few words; or, they might write their list three times and/or choose to help another student once they’ve written all the words one time. The expectation is that you just keep working and also that the teacher will be pleased with your work as long as you worked up to your potential (i.e., tried your hardest, no matter what that looks like compared to the other students) and stayed on-task the entire time.
We have a fast-paced day with no wasted minutes in the schedule. I can honestly say that the kids in my class are too busy to get into too much trouble.
Systematically and Explicitly Teach your Expectations
I wrote a post recently about our classroom vision and slogan. The slogan is ROAR and it is an acronym of our school rules (respect, on task, always safe, responsible). I will not repeat myself here, but please click on the link above and think about using a vision and/or slogan in your classroom. Be sure to teach any list of expectations slowly—one at a time—so students can fully understand and absorb each one before having to think about the next.
Teach Students How to Manage Impulsivity
Let’s face it; at this age, many behaviors are the result of impulsivity. Students touch others, hit, speak out of turn, break pencils or destroy others’ work, tear books, or mess up a school project because of impulsivity. We cannot, however, expect them to not be impulsive unless we 1) teach them what impulsive means and 2) teach them how to manage their impulsivity. They need to learn that they can control their body. I have written about this Habit of Mind here as well as all the others that I introduce and teach here. Please click on these links and get some ideas for teaching the appropriate behaviors you wish to see in your classroom.
Please Stop
You can share the endless job of managing students and their behaviors by teaching your students how to help and, at the same time, how to advocate for themselves. I teach students to say, “Please stop” when someone is bothering them. Don’t teach this the first week of school; wait until most of your students know how to sit and listen and are ready to hear this lesson and practice it with you. The general idea is that you are going to teach students how to solve social problems on their own, thereby taking some of the pressure off of you to constantly manage and intervene.
Model how to calmly and politely ask another student to stop doing something that is against the rules or that is bothering them. If another student is turned backward in line and talking to them, they should put their hand up and say, “Please stop.” The same action and words are used for innumerable scenarios: a student is touching another student, a student attempts to write or draw on someone else’s paper, a student kicks another student under the table, a student knocks over another student’s blocks and makes a loud crashing sound. Of course, you’ll want to use the hand signal and same words when you ask students to refrain from doing something that is bothering you. Model how not to put your hand in the other person’s face and the type of voice to use (not too authoritative and not whiny). These are the two issues I encounter the most in my kindergarten classroom with this strategy and which we need to periodically review.
In order for this to be effective, you must hold students accountable for using it and using it appropriately. Students cannot think of this as an option they have; they must learn that asking someone to stop doing a behavior that isn’t allowed or appreciated is a requirement in your kindergarten classroom. Let’s use some of the same examples from above. A student is backward in line talking. Instead of saying, “Please turn around and be quiet,” you can say to the student who is being talked to, “Why aren’t you saying ‘please stop’ to him? That’s your job; you have to say it.” If a student complains that a peer is touching his hair, you remind him, “What are you supposed to say?” or “What can you do about that?” A student comes to you and shows you that her paper was drawn on by a classmate. Rather than going to talk to the student who did the drawing on her paper, your response is, “Did you say ‘please stop’? Good. And did they stop? Great. Then everything worked out. There’s no problem.” A student starts swinging her legs under the table and, when she accidentally kicks the student across from her, she smiles and does it harder and faster. The one being kicked starts kicking back. You’ll want to balance your use of the two types of responses: “Please stop or you’ll need to leave the table” to the instigator and “If you don’t say ‘please stop’ when someone does that to you then you’ll need to leave the table.”
Yes, you will be requiring students to say please stop even in situations where they’re enjoying the misbehavior (like kicking back and forth under the table). But, if you hold them accountable for using this approach and helping you manage the classroom, soon a lot of the little annoying and distracting behaviors will start to fade away. No kindergartner wants to be told to stop by their peers so you’ll see them trying harder to refrain from certain behaviors in the first place.
Also, teaching children how to say please stop anytime that someone is doing something they don’t like is an excellent life skill. When your students are ready, encourage them to also state what exactly it is that they don’t like. “Please stop; I don’t want you touching my body.” Or, “Please stop. We can’t use the crayons yet.”
Please Go Away
There is a second aspect of this technique that, honestly, I’ve never known another teacher to use even though it works wonders for me in my classroom. When students are ready—and this is usually a couple of weeks after they’ve learned to say please stop and also that you are going to hold them responsible for saying it when necessary—you can teach them what to do when they say please stop to a peer and that student does not stop. The second step is to learn how to say, “Please go away” or “Go sit at a table” or “Go sit at a different table” or “Go to the end of the line.” Now, I know what you’re thinking; you’re thinking that kindergartners can’t handle this type of power. You’re thinking, yeah, no wonder you’ve never known another teacher who uses it. But I am here to tell you that I teach students how to use these words appropriately and that this is one of my most powerful ways to manage all the little behaviors that drive us crazy (i.e., let the students handle it). A student leans back on another student while sitting on the floor in a group. “Please stop” is said (step one). The student does it again. “Go sit at a table” is said (step two) by the student who just politely said please stop (step one). While teaching, I may or may not be aware of these exchange as they happen. Sometimes I look out across my classroom and I see a student calmly sitting far away. I know that someone sent them for a quick time-out. Either way, I was not interrupted and the teaching and learning continued.
You will have students who try to abuse this power. It’s only natural. It will require modeling, role playing, practicing, and a lot of discussion. Sometimes I have to tell students, “You don’t get to send students to time-out anymore because you’re not doing it the way I taught you.” In fact, sometimes I have to say, “You don’t get to say please stop anymore.” In a couple of days, I ask the student if they are ready to try again. Most students want to retain the privilege of using these tools (because they work!) and will usually not abuse it again.
Time-Out
Time-out is an excellent strategy to use in the kindergarten classroom. Why? Because almost all kindergartners want time-in and will try their hardest to manage themselves so they can be included. Remember, the ultimate reward is the opportunity to participate in the fun activities and empowering learning that you’re facilitating on a regular basis. Time-out is not a punishment and should not be conveyed as one; rather, it is an option. A choice. A positive way to take a break and come back when you’re ready. Long before students are allowed to send their peers to a table (or a different table), I have taught the entire class that going to a table can be a good option. “If someone is bothering you, you can go sit at a table.” The table is close; they can see and hear the instruction; and, I expect them to continue paying attention and learning. “You’re uncomfortable on the floor? Go sit at a table.” “Someone at your table is taking your blocks? You can always go work at the other block table if you want to.” By the time a classmate has the power to send another student to a table, the students know that being sent to a table really isn’t that big of a deal. They also know that they can come back to the group whenever they feel ready. What is the big deal then? Why does it work so well when kids ask other kids to take a quick time out? Because kids want time-in. And also because most kids would rather be on the delivery end of “please stop” or “go to a table” than on the receiving end. So they start to change their behaviors.
Let the Class Do the Talking
Another way to take advantage of kindergartners not wanting to be on the receiving end of their peers’ management is to let the class talk to them as a whole. If a student is loudly crying (again, for no apparent reason; you know the student isn’t in distress) and you’ve exhausted some other techniques, you can guide the class in speaking to the student. “Class, let’s ask Dominic to stop crying. Copy me. Dominic…” (the class copies you, saying his name); “please stop crying” (the class repeats after you); “we are trying to learn and we can’t hear the teacher” (the class then says this part). Notice that I said to try other strategies before this one. This approach can sometimes be embarrassing to the student. It’s okay to embarrass a child slightly (after all, this is how a lot of behaviors are changed, even with ourselves), but tread carefully and be sure the child knows that you’re doing this out of love.
Write Student Names on the Board
A few weeks into the school year—after the basic expectations have been communicated but there are still those few students who want to do things their way—I start writing names on the board. If I’ve said, “Please stop” and I’ve moved the student away from whatever he’s having trouble with (or, he gets to three when I’m counting and giving him ample opportunity to stop) and he’s still disrupting class and learning, I say, “I’m going to have to write your name on the board.” If I haven’t explained it to the class yet or it’s still early in the year, I say, “I’m writing your name to remind us that you need to stay in at recess and have a talk with me.” Writing a student’s name on the board is not a consequence in and of itself. And it’s not shaming. It truly is a reminder to me and the students who will need to stay in and chat with me for a few minutes. In the fall, there can sometimes be four or five students. We briefly talk about what happened for them to get their name on the board and then we talk about the expectations. Again. They’ve heard the expectations plenty of times, so yes, the talk is usually pretty boring. Intentionally boring. I do not want this to be fun. After a few minutes—just long enough for them to really, really wish they were outside playing instead of inside listening to me—I set them free. Each talk ends with, “Why did I keep you in here? Because I love you and I want you to learn how to behave.”
Some may say that writing students’ names on the boards isn’t helpful, that the same students will just keep getting their names on the board. I find it very helpful, sometimes for the students who are misbehaving, but mostly for all the others. Just the idea of getting their name on the board keeps the majority of students well aware of the expectations and whether they’re living up to them. Most kids would be horrified to get their name on the board and have to talk to the teacher during recess. I also know this works because by the time spring rolls around we rarely have names on the board. Most everyone has figured out that it’s more desirable to just behave and go play.
Star Chart for Changing a Targeted Behavior
Each fall, I usually have at least a few students who need focused support to change their behavior. Whether the lingering behavior is not attending to instruction, continuing to be impulsive and not thinking first, crying or screaming, or refusing to do written work, I start the student(s) on a daily star chart. You can click on the link to see if this is something that might work for you. Several teachers have told me that they can’t do it; it’s too time consuming. But it has worked very well for me and for my students and therefore I think the time it takes is well worth it.
When using a star chart, I communicate to parents what we’re working on with their child. Each day, students can earn up to ten stars. Eight or more is considered a good day; I do not expect a perfect ten from any five-year-old. If I see parents at the end of the day, I have the students report their number. If I won’t see parents, I either email them or I write the number that represents the total stars for the day on the student’s hand. Parents are free to hand out rewards or consequences as they see fit.
Speaking of parents, I do not find it necessary to report on behavior to the majority of parents. I say this because I’ve heard of teachers who send home a written behavior report for every student every day or use an app that requires parents to be aware of their child’s behavior every day. To me, this is not necessary. Let’s just say and assume that good behavior is the expectation and that working on behavior in kindergarten is the norm. If a parent’s awareness or help is deemed necessary, then I will contact the parent. Otherwise, what I do with students and their behavior is between me and the students. This approach allows students to take ownership for managing their behavior without their parents’ oversight.
Sing
Some teachers like to sing; some don’t. If you do, use this to gently and lovingly manage your students. I remember a particular instance of doing this with my own three-year-old daughter years ago. I wanted her to put on her shoes so we could go run an errand. I asked her; no response. Instead of asking her again, I made up a song on the spot, using a well-known melody (I can’t remember now what it was): Put your shoes on, little girl, if you want to go with me. You have to hurry; I am leaving. It would be sad if you stayed home alone. I have several songs that I use in my classroom. The students always seem to quiet and listen more intently whenever I sing to them. (This is true, too, when I sing books instead of read them.) They especially like when I switch up the lyrics to match the current situation; and if it has to do with complying with the directions just given, they do seem to hustle and try to do exactly what I say with the lyrics. This falling into the gentle discipline category, there are never any hard feelings. It’s just fun (and effective).
Teach Peace
Whenever you can, teach your students the concepts of peace and peaceful. It’s safe to assume that many of our students come from slightly chaotic environments—busy homes, wild older siblings, the noise of television, video games, loud music, and arguing or shouting. When your classroom is quiet and peaceful, point it out to your students. Talk about how nice it is and that it means that you all know how to get along with each other. Close your eyes and listen to the peace. Soak it in. Soon, you will find your students intentionally seeking out peaceful activities, places, and people.
There are many different types of behaviors to deal with and thus we need many strategies and consequences in our arsenal. Plus, we all know that different students respond differently to what we try. In this post, I listed several strategies I tend to use the most. If you’ve dealt with a certain behavior or issue and you’re pretty sure none of these would work and you need further ideas, please talk to me about that in the comments section. I can provide additional support and so, too, can other subscribers. You can also message me privately, if you prefer.
I could write a whole book on this topic (some have suggested I should) and it certainly deserves it. A book would be written over a long period of time, revised, edited, and “perfected” before being published. While I did spend about 20 hours on these two behavior posts, I know there may be discrepancies, holes, things left unexplained. I did my best. Now, let’s improve its worth by dialoguing in the comments section. Did you get some ideas on how to improve your behavior management? What questions do you have? What specific behaviors do you need assistance with? Help me to help you.
I sincerely want you to love teaching kindergarten and to become the best teacher you can be. My vehicle for assisting you with this is busybeekindergarten.substack.com.
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I have put together a short document that summarizes the strategies I shared here. If you are struggling with behavior management in your classroom, you might want to choose three or four of these ideas, highlight them, and make a conscious effort to try them out in your classroom. You’ll want to try different strategies with different students. Email me for the document (missbusybeekindergarten@gmail.com). You can also message me at any time and ask for assistance and ideas. I won’t have all the answers, but together we can hopefully make things better for you and your students.
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